Today, I learned a valuable life lesson. You can not always do it yourself. For some reason, my independence had me in a false state of mind that I could fix any of my problems if I just spent enough time alone thinking about them, but this is almost never the case. I suppose that this way of searching for answers may occasionally come upon some sort of appeasement of my questioning, but I also found myself often spiraling down into a negatively-fueled pity-session where I was trying be the therapist and the patient simultaneously. Asking for answers from the very person who asked the question. Sometimes it just takes another person, or group of people, to help you answer those deep and often dark questions that elude you when you're by yourself. Like trying to catch your own shadow, it is often out of reach unless someone else makes the shadow for you.
Now, new life lesson to attempt... eventually. Learning how to accept the fact that you can not always get everything you want. Too many times I find myself obsessing over something or even someone that I desire, a burning that I just can't seem to put out. Maybe it's a good thing that I can feel so strongly about something, but it's also scary. Letting go can be a hard thing for anyone, but my fear of rejection makes me afraid to even initiate contact. But obsessing is one of my flaws. That is another thing that being around a group of people that you like can help alleviate. Being with friends can make you forget everything you thought or felt about that thing or person you were just consumed with recently. Just the other day, I scared myself when for the first time ever, I found myself crying and I could not determine a reason for it. Here I was, standing in the shower and crying. Isn't this what girls do almost every day? But I'm not a girl... and that's a stereotype. So what is wrong with me? I know exactly what (or rather who) was bothering me, but I honestly do not feel the need to write it down for this blog. Just don't worry about and don't let your dreams get the best of you, that's the best advice I can give myself. (see... therapist... at least I'm in a better mood)
So, I'll leave myself with a few questions from the book that I am currently reading.
Who are you?
Where does the world come from?
Now, new life lesson to attempt... eventually. Learning how to accept the fact that you can not always get everything you want. Too many times I find myself obsessing over something or even someone that I desire, a burning that I just can't seem to put out. Maybe it's a good thing that I can feel so strongly about something, but it's also scary. Letting go can be a hard thing for anyone, but my fear of rejection makes me afraid to even initiate contact. But obsessing is one of my flaws. That is another thing that being around a group of people that you like can help alleviate. Being with friends can make you forget everything you thought or felt about that thing or person you were just consumed with recently. Just the other day, I scared myself when for the first time ever, I found myself crying and I could not determine a reason for it. Here I was, standing in the shower and crying. Isn't this what girls do almost every day? But I'm not a girl... and that's a stereotype. So what is wrong with me? I know exactly what (or rather who) was bothering me, but I honestly do not feel the need to write it down for this blog. Just don't worry about and don't let your dreams get the best of you, that's the best advice I can give myself. (see... therapist... at least I'm in a better mood)
So, I'll leave myself with a few questions from the book that I am currently reading.
Who are you?
Where does the world come from?
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