So, summer is flying by and it's getting to the point where the schedule is just so full that it is going to be time to return to school in no time. I felt this entry was necessary because I, being Joey Meyers, am about to embark on a mission trip with my church and would love to document my before and after feelings about the trip. Yeah, boring feelings boring blah blah blah but any change in myself means something to me.
Right now, I can not accurately say how I feel about the coming week besides muted anticipation. I feel a dull throbbing of anxiety, but at the same time, I have been on several other mission trips before which eliminates the surprise element of this service trip. However, I have never gone into a mission trip in the state of faith that I am in currently. For about a year or two now, I have not been praying or worshipping God as I once did when I was younger. My logical, fundamental side says that science has all of the answers that could ever be asked while my emotional side longs for a relationship with Jesus and one that I can share with others of faith. My goals for this week are to open myself up to a relationship, a new path in my life that will hopefully fill this void that I've been feeling because I feel as if I am wandering a path with no destination in mind. I suppose only time will tell the result of this trip.
Another one of my goals for this week is to let go of many of my worries so that for one week, I may selflessly serve others. I want to serve and I want to help others, but I cannot do this without leaving behind my selfish worries and doubts. I need to find some time to meditate every day and find peace within myself. A self exploration adventure. Definitely an adventure. Let's see what this week has in store.
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